Episode #168 Polite Greetings

Ever been bowled over by your dog's overzealous hellos? Fear not, Amy Jensen here, and I've got the training treats and tips you need to transform your pooch's greetings from boisterous to genteel. In this episode, we unpack the art of teaching your dog the sit-and-greet—a doggy handshake, if you will. With a generous sprinkle of patience and a dash of high-value treats, we'll guide you through setting clear expectations for your furry friend. You'll learn how the charming 'sit to say please' method isn't just about impressing your neighbors, but also about aligning your dog's natural exuberance with human social niceties.

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

This is the Puppy Training Podcast, episode 168, polite greetings. This podcast is designed to help you on your journey of becoming best friends through love and learning, as you train your own dog from home, and I'm here to help you every step of the way. This is the Puppy Training Podcast, and I'm your host, amy Jensen. Hi and welcome to the Puppy Training Podcast. Thank you so much for listening. It's because of you that I get to do what I love doing, and I really really appreciate it. Also, thank you for sharing this show with your friends.

Speaker 1: 0:38

My goal is to help anyone who has a dog enjoy living life with their dog, so if you know someone looking for help, send them our way. Today I want to talk about greetings. Does your dog need to sit when being greeted? Is it okay if my dog is excited? How do we help shape our dog's behavior, even when they're bouncing around like crazy? I've been there. I know many of you have been there. We have these exciting dogs that are just super happy to see people, and what do we do about it? So if you are thinking, yep, that's my dog, no worries, you have a happy dog, which is good, but today's tips can help with their greetings and to be more polite. So just remember, dogs are dogs. They don't know human rules, and it's our job to teach them how to interact with a human. Now, just as important as teaching your kids how to properly act around others. Dogs need to learn an appropriate way to say hello to people, as this will inevitably be a part of everyday life while living as a member of our families. Now note I said an appropriate way, not the appropriate way, as this will be different for different people and dogs.

Speaker 1: 1:39

Each dog is a living, breathing creature with their own mind, and they get to make their own decisions. So we just want to help shape their behavior in a nice, polite way so that when they greet other humans, it's nice and polite to that human as well. It is a rare individual who enjoys it when a stranger's dog abruptly introduces themselves by jumping all over them. Now, smaller dogs they tend to get away with this more than larger dogs. Go figure right. It is simply good manners to teach our dogs how to properly greet people. Now, this can and should be taught correctly from the very beginning of our training, but it's never too late to get started. So if you have a dog that you know you're one or two years down the road and they maybe aren't super polite when they greet a person. That's okay. Starting today is better than next week and next week is better than next month. So just pick a goal Today. I'm going to give you a few different ways to teach your dog to greet a human and then choose one that works for you and your dog and get started as soon as possible. So, as mentioned again, I'm going to give you several options and I just want you to pick one that resonates with you and works for your dog.

Speaker 1: 2:45

Now, first things first. When a visitor arrives at your home or you meet someone on the street, imagine what you want your puppy to do. What do you prefer this encounter to look like? What are you trying to achieve? What behavior? Would you love it if your dog gave that behavior?

Speaker 1: 3:03

Now, without a clear picture, it's hard to expect much, as I guarantee your dog has their own ideas. I initially pictured my dog calmly walking over to the person, sitting at their feet, waiting for the person to acknowledge them. In reality, it looks a little more like my doodle excitedly walks over to the person, tail wagging, to the point that his little bottom is moving from side to side. He then sniffs their pant leg a little and plops his behind on the floor, looking up at the person as if to say please, please, will you please pet me Now, if he really likes the person. His whole body wriggles with excitement as he tries his hardest to remain seated for attention and he does a great job at this. He knows, as he's been taught, that sitting is the fastest way to get what he wants. So he sits to say please, say hello to me. Now. That's a little bit of a compromise, but I'm totally fine with it. In his own little way, he is sitting to say please Now, even though my puppy's actions may vary slightly from that nice and relaxed version in my mind.

Speaker 1: 3:58

My puppy did, in fact, in his own way, exactly what I wanted him to do. There was no jumping, no pushing, no licking. He controlled his excitement, you know, as best as he could. He still wiggled and wriggled and moved about. That's okay, but he did sit waiting for attention, and that is important. So keep in mind that your dog, again, is a living being with a mind of his own and, as he's learning, always remain positive and reward the good, better and best behaviors.

Speaker 1: 4:24

Try to focus on marking and rewarding the polite greeting of sitting for attention, even though his version of sitting for attention is a bit more excited than maybe what I had pictured in my mind. So I will continually work on fine tuning it as he gets more experienced. But in the beginning make sure that you capture these small wins, any little small win. You know he gives you attention. Mark and reward that he sits for a second. Mark and reward that. That's all great. And then we can strengthen this behavior of sitting to be greeted as he gets a little older and he's more mature. But we're getting the behavior initially, we're rewarding the small successes and eventually it will evolve into that nice calm sit to say please or sit to be greeted.

Speaker 1: 5:04

Now, if your puppy is too excited to sit initially, that's pretty common right. So try tossing a food reward away from the person they're wanting to greet. You'll have to make sure that your puppy knows what you have, that it's a higher value food item. It's probably not a piece of kibble. That's not going to be more exciting than the person they want to meet. Meat and cheese items are usually at the top of the list for most dogs. So find something that excites them and then again, you're going to put that food reward right on their nose and, as they look at the person, immediately toss or roll I like to roll it on the ground even so.

Speaker 1: 5:34

They get to chase it because that adds to the fun but roll that little food reward away from the person. So they get to see the person turn away, chase a piece of food, collect the piece of food and then they're going to turn around to come see that person again, immediately send them away to chase that piece of food. You're going to do this five to 10 times until they figure it out. Oh, I look at the person. She tosses food. I look at the person. She tosses food away. And so they get to do all sorts of fun things in this game. They get to see as an exciting person, they get to chase a piece of food, they get to eat the yummy food and then they get to come back and play it all over again. This is multiple wins for your dog. Now, maybe you've done that 10 times, or maybe even just five times, that's okay. Several times. So they get the game and then, as that dog starts to turn back to the person. I would see if they could do a sit to say, please see if that dog will sit, and then we toss the food. So now we've instigated a new rule that, okay, we're playing the same game but instead of you just looking at the person and I toss food away, you're going to look at that person, you're going to sit and then I toss food away. Some of you will be able to play this game within five, six feet of the exciting person. Others of you might need to be 10, 12, 15 feet away from the exciting person.

Speaker 1: 6:48

You do what's best for you and your dog, what your dog can handle. Again, remember, we're always trying to set our dogs up for success. That means, in this moment where I want my dog to greet a person politely, what can I do to make this experience easier for them? Distance is going to be your best friend. So usually, if a dog is too excitable, they won't focus on the little piece of cheese you have that you're tossing away. Just back up a few steps, see if you can move away four or five, 10 more feet, and then will your puppy chase the little piece of food? You're going to get the same repetitions, the same practice, but just from a distance that your puppy can now win. That's going to move the training along much faster.

Speaker 1: 7:27

The more wins and successes your puppy experiences, the faster that overall end behavior starts to happen. And then you know, you practice from a distance away. We start to move closer. We play that same game, but we move a few feet closer as the dog can be successful. So again, set your dogs up for success. But this is a great game because the puppy gets to see the person that they want to go say hi to, but they can't really hold still, they're too excitable so we get to send them away from the person. All sorts of wins are happening on our end as well.

Speaker 1: 7:57

The puppy's attention is being drawn away from the person. All four paws are staying on the ground and, like I said, after repetition five, six, seven, eight, nine, 10, that puppy, you can start to get them to sit to say please, to start the game and look what you're building. You're building that nice sit to be greeted behavior, all while playing a game where your puppy can move, which is often what they need to do. Anyway, they don't know how to control their impulses with this exciting stranger around. So create a little bit of distance, start playing this game. You can even have that person toss the food away if you want, if they want to help you out.

Speaker 1: 8:32

What about the puppy who's a little nervous to greet strangers? Maybe it's the opposite problem, right. Maybe they're not so excited, but they're like I don't know what to do with this stranger. So every time your puppy sees a stranger and they seem a little nervous, you'll be able to tell by their body language. If you need help reading your dog's body language, we have a class on that. So check out our classes and courses and click on body language. But you'll turn and walk away from the person and I just want you to immediately feed your puppy as you walk away. So you'll just say, let's go, we'll turn and walk away, we'll feed them as we walk away and once you are a distance away, where your puppy starts to relax again, you'll notice by their body language that their stress is starting to melt away. Then we ask our puppy to sit and we feed our dog food rewards while that person walks past. Now, when the person's gone, we stop feeding.

Speaker 1: 9:18

It's ideal if we can get multiple repetitions in with this same person. So what I might do in this session would be see the person turn and walk away, reward my dog for walking away. Maybe I can get them to sit and watch the person for a little bit. Or maybe you just simply turn back to the person. Let the dog see the person turn away again, let's go. We go the opposite direction. We create distance.

Speaker 1: 9:39

We reward our dog for turning and walking away and then we turn back around. We see the person, let's go. We turn and walk away again. So I'm getting multiple repetitions in of I see a person, I feel a little anxious. We just turn and walk away. We create that distance, the stress levels come down and then, yeah, a couple of those times, maybe you get a couple of those repetitions in, and then we do the sit to say please, or sit to be greeted at behavior where they see the person. But we're just practicing the sit component of it. Anyway, sounds good.

Speaker 1: 10:06

So if you have a dog that doesn't really want to greet a person, I would never force that interaction. I would never let a person come and approach my dog If my dog's appearing nervous about it. I would just ask the person to give us a minute or maybe say politely not today, but thanks for asking. That's okay. Be your dog's advocate and if your dog's not filling up for it, they do not need to greet a person. So this week, think of how you picture your puppy greeting someone and begin teaching your puppy to do it better.

Speaker 1: 10:30

Remember to keep your dog's perspective in mind. What will work best for your dog and their personality? Remember to use the leash. That's our management tool and we always pair the management with the training. So just by keeping your dog on a leash we can prevent them from practicing jumping all over people. Don't let them get close enough where they can practice the jumping. Keep your dog on a leash at a distance from the person where they can't reach them, and then start playing the games that we talked about today to build that nice, good greeting behavior. All right, you guys are amazing. Enjoy your dogs this week. Go live life with them. Do something that you both enjoy together. Happy training and we'll talk soon. If you have a question about anything you heard on this podcast or any other puppy training question, visit my site, baxter and Bellacom, to contact me.